(Ruth Sharon, M.A. Instructor in Assertiveness Training Greeley, Colorado)
I HAVE THE RIGHT...
* to be responsible for my own life
* to accept and respect myself and others
* to feel happy, satisfied, and to allow inner peace
* take good care of my whole being; my body, my mind, and my spirit
* to be imperfect
* to be aware of and fulfill my own needle
* to have dreams, goals, and ideals -- and to make them happen
* to have and express all my emotions
* to tell others how I want to be treated
* to allow people to help me without feeling guilty, unworthy, or dependent
* to set my own priorities about my use of time, money, space and energy
* to get what i pay for
* to have healthy, life-enhancing relationships, where clear communication is
valued -- to make conscious decisions to change relationships
* to change, emerge, expand in new directions
* to have my own beliefs, ideas, values without apology to anyone
* to live in the present moment, free of guilt in the past and worry for the future
* to relax, to let go, to "do" nothing
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Thursday, April 23, 2009
A THING NOBODY CAN TAKE AWAY
ATTITUDE
Jerry is the manager of a restaurant in America. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would always reply, "If I were any better, would be twins!"
Many of the waiters at his restaurant quit their jobs when he changed jobs, so they could follow him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude.
He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was always there, telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.
Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, "I don't get it! No one can be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Jerry replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, I have two choices today. I can choose to be in a good mood or I can choose to be in a bad mood. I always choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I always choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I always choose the positive side of life."
"But it's not always that easy," I protested.
"Yes, it is," Jerry said "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. It's your choice how you live your life."
Several years later, I heard that Jerry accidentally did something you are never
supposed to do in the restaurant business: he left the back door of his restaurant open one morning and was robbed by three armed men. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness slipped off the combination.
The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found quickly and rushed to the hospital. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any
better, I'd be twins. Want to see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place.
"The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door," Jerry replied.
"Then, after they shot me, as I lay on the floor, remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or choose to die. I chose to live."
"Weren't you scared?" I asked. Jerry continued, "The paramedics were
great. They kept telling me. I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me
into the Emergency Room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors
and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'He's a dead man.' I
knew I need to take action."
"What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big nurse shouting questions at me," said Jerry. "She asked if I was allergic to anything."
'Yes,' I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Bullets!'
Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Please operate on me as if I am alive, not dead'."
Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that EVERY DAY YOU HAVE THE CHOICE TO EITHER ENJOY YOUR LIFE, OR TO HATE IT.
The only thing that is truly yours that no one can control or take from you - is YOUR ATTITUDE, so if you can take care of that, everything else in life becomes much easier.
Jerry is the manager of a restaurant in America. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would always reply, "If I were any better, would be twins!"
Many of the waiters at his restaurant quit their jobs when he changed jobs, so they could follow him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude.
He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was always there, telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.
Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, "I don't get it! No one can be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Jerry replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, I have two choices today. I can choose to be in a good mood or I can choose to be in a bad mood. I always choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I always choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I always choose the positive side of life."
"But it's not always that easy," I protested.
"Yes, it is," Jerry said "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. It's your choice how you live your life."
Several years later, I heard that Jerry accidentally did something you are never
supposed to do in the restaurant business: he left the back door of his restaurant open one morning and was robbed by three armed men. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness slipped off the combination.
The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found quickly and rushed to the hospital. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any
better, I'd be twins. Want to see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place.
"The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door," Jerry replied.
"Then, after they shot me, as I lay on the floor, remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or choose to die. I chose to live."
"Weren't you scared?" I asked. Jerry continued, "The paramedics were
great. They kept telling me. I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me
into the Emergency Room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors
and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'He's a dead man.' I
knew I need to take action."
"What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big nurse shouting questions at me," said Jerry. "She asked if I was allergic to anything."
'Yes,' I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Bullets!'
Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Please operate on me as if I am alive, not dead'."
Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that EVERY DAY YOU HAVE THE CHOICE TO EITHER ENJOY YOUR LIFE, OR TO HATE IT.
The only thing that is truly yours that no one can control or take from you - is YOUR ATTITUDE, so if you can take care of that, everything else in life becomes much easier.
Sleep While The Wind Blows
Years ago, a farmer owned land along the Atlantic seacoast. He
constantly advertised for hired hands. Most people were reluctant to
work
on farms along the Atlantic. They dreaded the awful storms that raged
across the Atlantic, wreaking havoc on the buildings and crops.
As the farmer interviewed applicants for the job, he received a
steady
stream of refusals. Finally, a short, thin man, well past middle age,
approached the farmer. "Are you a good farm hand?" the farmer asked
him.
"Well, I can sleep when the wind blows," answered the little man.
Although puzzled by this answer, the farmer, desperate for help,
hired
him. The little man worked well around the farm, busy from dawn to
dusk,
and the farmer was satisfied with the man's work.
Then one night the wind howled loudly in from offshore. Jumping out
of
bed, the farmer grabbed a lantern and rushed next door to the hired
hand's
sleeping quarters. He shook the little man and yelled, "Get up! A
storm is
coming! Tie things down before they blow away!"
The little man rolled over in bed and said firmly, "No sir. I told
you, I
can sleep when the wind blows."
Enraged by the response, the farmer was tempted to fire him onthe
spot.
Instead, he hurried outside to prepare for the storm. To his amazement,
he
discovered that all of the haystacks had been covered with tarpaulins.
The
cows were in the barn, the chickens were in the coops, and the doors
were
barred.
The shutters were tightly secured. Everything was tied down.
Nothing
could blow away. The farmer then understood what his hired hand meant,
so he
returned to his bed to also sleep while the wind blew.
MORAL OF THE STORY
When you're prepared, spiritually, mentally, and physically, you have nothing to fear.
Can you sleep when the wind blows through your life?
The hired hand in the story was able to sleep because he had secured
the farm against the storm. We secure ourselves against the storms of life
by grounding ourselves in the Word of God.
We don't need to understand, we just need to hold His hand to have
peace in the middle of storms.
A friend sent this to me today, and I wanted to send it to you. sleep
well.
constantly advertised for hired hands. Most people were reluctant to
work
on farms along the Atlantic. They dreaded the awful storms that raged
across the Atlantic, wreaking havoc on the buildings and crops.
As the farmer interviewed applicants for the job, he received a
steady
stream of refusals. Finally, a short, thin man, well past middle age,
approached the farmer. "Are you a good farm hand?" the farmer asked
him.
"Well, I can sleep when the wind blows," answered the little man.
Although puzzled by this answer, the farmer, desperate for help,
hired
him. The little man worked well around the farm, busy from dawn to
dusk,
and the farmer was satisfied with the man's work.
Then one night the wind howled loudly in from offshore. Jumping out
of
bed, the farmer grabbed a lantern and rushed next door to the hired
hand's
sleeping quarters. He shook the little man and yelled, "Get up! A
storm is
coming! Tie things down before they blow away!"
The little man rolled over in bed and said firmly, "No sir. I told
you, I
can sleep when the wind blows."
Enraged by the response, the farmer was tempted to fire him onthe
spot.
Instead, he hurried outside to prepare for the storm. To his amazement,
he
discovered that all of the haystacks had been covered with tarpaulins.
The
cows were in the barn, the chickens were in the coops, and the doors
were
barred.
The shutters were tightly secured. Everything was tied down.
Nothing
could blow away. The farmer then understood what his hired hand meant,
so he
returned to his bed to also sleep while the wind blew.
MORAL OF THE STORY
When you're prepared, spiritually, mentally, and physically, you have nothing to fear.
Can you sleep when the wind blows through your life?
The hired hand in the story was able to sleep because he had secured
the farm against the storm. We secure ourselves against the storms of life
by grounding ourselves in the Word of God.
We don't need to understand, we just need to hold His hand to have
peace in the middle of storms.
A friend sent this to me today, and I wanted to send it to you. sleep
well.
Years ago, a farmer owned land along the Atlantic seacoast. He
constantly advertised for hired hands. Most people were reluctant to
work
on farms along the Atlantic. They dreaded the awful storms that raged
across the Atlantic, wreaking havoc on the buildings and crops.
As the farmer interviewed applicants for the job, he received a
steady
stream of refusals. Finally, a short, thin man, well past middle age,
approached the farmer. "Are you a good farm hand?" the farmer asked
him.
"Well, I can sleep when the wind blows," answered the little man.
Although puzzled by this answer, the farmer, desperate for help,
hired
him. The little man worked well around the farm, busy from dawn to
dusk,
and the farmer was satisfied with the man's work.
Then one night the wind howled loudly in from offshore. Jumping out
of
bed, the farmer grabbed a lantern and rushed next door to the hired
hand's
sleeping quarters. He shook the little man and yelled, "Get up! A
storm is
coming! Tie things down before they blow away!"
The little man rolled over in bed and said firmly, "No sir. I told
you, I
can sleep when the wind blows."
Enraged by the response, the farmer was tempted to fire him onthe
spot.
Instead, he hurried outside to prepare for the storm. To his amazement,
he
discovered that all of the haystacks had been covered with tarpaulins.
The
cows were in the barn, the chickens were in the coops, and the doors
were
barred.
The shutters were tightly secured. Everything was tied down.
Nothing
could blow away. The farmer then understood what his hired hand meant,
so he
returned to his bed to also sleep while the wind blew.
MORAL OF THE STORY
When you're prepared, spiritually, mentally, and physically, you have nothing to fear.
Can you sleep when the wind blows through your life?
The hired hand in the story was able to sleep because he had secured
the farm against the storm. We secure ourselves against the storms of life
by grounding ourselves in the Word of God.
We don't need to understand, we just need to hold His hand to have
peace in the middle of storms.
A friend sent this to me today, and I wanted to send it to you. sleep
well.
constantly advertised for hired hands. Most people were reluctant to
work
on farms along the Atlantic. They dreaded the awful storms that raged
across the Atlantic, wreaking havoc on the buildings and crops.
As the farmer interviewed applicants for the job, he received a
steady
stream of refusals. Finally, a short, thin man, well past middle age,
approached the farmer. "Are you a good farm hand?" the farmer asked
him.
"Well, I can sleep when the wind blows," answered the little man.
Although puzzled by this answer, the farmer, desperate for help,
hired
him. The little man worked well around the farm, busy from dawn to
dusk,
and the farmer was satisfied with the man's work.
Then one night the wind howled loudly in from offshore. Jumping out
of
bed, the farmer grabbed a lantern and rushed next door to the hired
hand's
sleeping quarters. He shook the little man and yelled, "Get up! A
storm is
coming! Tie things down before they blow away!"
The little man rolled over in bed and said firmly, "No sir. I told
you, I
can sleep when the wind blows."
Enraged by the response, the farmer was tempted to fire him onthe
spot.
Instead, he hurried outside to prepare for the storm. To his amazement,
he
discovered that all of the haystacks had been covered with tarpaulins.
The
cows were in the barn, the chickens were in the coops, and the doors
were
barred.
The shutters were tightly secured. Everything was tied down.
Nothing
could blow away. The farmer then understood what his hired hand meant,
so he
returned to his bed to also sleep while the wind blew.
MORAL OF THE STORY
When you're prepared, spiritually, mentally, and physically, you have nothing to fear.
Can you sleep when the wind blows through your life?
The hired hand in the story was able to sleep because he had secured
the farm against the storm. We secure ourselves against the storms of life
by grounding ourselves in the Word of God.
We don't need to understand, we just need to hold His hand to have
peace in the middle of storms.
A friend sent this to me today, and I wanted to send it to you. sleep
well.
I'll Be Happy When...
We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, when we are able to go on a nice vacation or when we retire. The truth is there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time with ... and remember that time waits for no one.
Until your car or home is paid off.
Until you get a new car or home.
Until your kids leave the house.
Until you go back to school.
Until you finish school.
Until you lose 10 lbs.
Until you gain 10 lbs.
Until you get married.
Until you have kids.
Until you retire.
Until summer..
Until spring.
Until winter.
Until fall.
Until you die.
There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt, and, dance like no one's watching. 
"We should live each day wisely, as if there is no tomorrow. Tell someone you love them today. The little things do matter. Offer a helping hand, because tomorrow may not come, and if you miss the opportunity to do it now you may never have the chance to do it later. Time is not a commodity, it is not something that can be bought, sold, postpone, hurried or delayed. It is a precious gift from the one who will turn dark clouds away. He is the one who feeds the sparrow and He is the one who holds your hand." 
A Full Glass of Milk
Very nice story to spread to...
One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay for his hungry stomach, decided he would ask for a meal at the next house.
On the way through school, he found he had only one thin dime left and he was very hungry.
However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.
Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water.
The woman thought he looked hungry, so brought him a large glass of milk.
He drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"
"You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us, never to accept pay for a kindness."
He said..."Then I thank you from my heart."
Year's later that young woman became critically ill.
The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease.
Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation.
When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room.
Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her.
He recognized her at once.
He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won.
Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him
for approval. He looked at it, then, wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room.
The woman feared opening it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all.
Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill.
She read these words..."Paid in full with one glass of milk."
Signed,
Dr.Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed:
Thank You, God, that Your love has spread abroad through human hearts and hands."
Now you have two choices.
You can send this page on and spread a positive message.
Or ignore it and pretend it never touched your heart.
"Adversities,misfortunes and setbacks
may not seem to be what they are;
GOD has a better plan for you!"
One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay for his hungry stomach, decided he would ask for a meal at the next house.
On the way through school, he found he had only one thin dime left and he was very hungry.
However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.
Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water.
The woman thought he looked hungry, so brought him a large glass of milk.
He drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"
"You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us, never to accept pay for a kindness."
He said..."Then I thank you from my heart."
Year's later that young woman became critically ill.
The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease.
Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation.
When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room.
Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her.
He recognized her at once.
He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won.
Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him
for approval. He looked at it, then, wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room.
The woman feared opening it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all.
Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill.
She read these words..."Paid in full with one glass of milk."
Signed,
Dr.Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed:
Thank You, God, that Your love has spread abroad through human hearts and hands."
Now you have two choices.
You can send this page on and spread a positive message.
Or ignore it and pretend it never touched your heart.
"Adversities,misfortunes and setbacks
may not seem to be what they are;
GOD has a better plan for you!"
To My Child (A Dad's Poem)
- from a Zimbabwean Dad
Just for this morning, I am going to
smile when I see your face and laugh
when I feel like crying.
Just for this morning, I will let you
choose what you want to wear,
and smile and say how perfect it is.
Just for this morning, I am going to step
over the laundry and pick you up and take you to
the park to play.
Just for this morning, I will leave the
dishes in the sink, and let you teach me how to put
that puzzle of yours together.
Just for this afternoon, I will unplug
the telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with
you in the backyard and blow bubbles.
Just for this afternoon, I will not yell
once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and
whine for the ice cream truck, and I will buy you one
if he comes by.
Just for this afternoon, I won't worry
about what you are going to be when you grow up, or
second guess every decision I have made where you are
concerned.
Just for this afternoon, I will let you
help me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you
trying to fix them.
Just for this afternoon, I will take us
to McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can
have both toys.
Just for this evening, I will hold you in
my arms and tell you a story about how you were
born and how much I love you.
Just for this evening, I will let you
splash in the tub and not get angry.
Just for this evening, I will let you
stay up late while we sit on the porch and count all
the stars.
Just for this evening, I will snuggle
beside you for hours, and miss my favourite TV
shows.
Just for this evening when I run my
finger through your hair as you pray, I will simply be
grateful that God has given me the greatest gift ever
given.
I will think about the mothers and
fathers who are searching for their missing children, the
mothers and fathers who are visiting their children's
graves instead of their bedrooms. The mothers
and fathers who are in hospital rooms
watching their children suffer senselessly and screaming
inside that little body
And when I kiss you goodnight I will hold
you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then,
that I will thank God for you, and ask him for
nothing, except one more day.............
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